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Mindovermaster

Finding a Job

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Most professors (especially tenured ones) can't balance properly.

 

Generally that's also why some of the best profs you'll get will have a job outside of the University where teaching is their primary focus or they are simply sessional professors that aren't on tenure.

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lol

 

 

 

 

LOL :ninja:

Snap!

 

Yeah set realistic limits for yourself - give yourself an objective assessment rather than blaming the environment.

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Yep. University doesn't really teach you the knowledge required for your job. It trains you as a person and work habits, and gives you a degree for it. :ninja:

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I was never a "group" person. You guys have no clue how hard this was for me...

 

*walks out of thread*

No, I don't have a clue how hard it was for you. Maybe this is where your Problem is.

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Big Bang might be right, running a social life and a academic life is a good feature. Makes life a lot easier to have others that are willing to help out.

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I think it's clear that while you may be able to make it through school by yourself (If you're that good), it's impossible to get a proper job where you don't need to work effectively as a team.

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In many cases it's the pure academic that has the most trouble once they graduate and enter the workforce because they don't have the skills already developed to effectively work in a team environment.

 

Don't get me wrong, I'm a strong advocate of education, but I can't see anyone being successful at work if all they do is study!

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*Breaks down door*

 

I work fine as a team once they respect me for who I am. I am NOT a person who walks up to people and starts talking. I am an independent person, have always been.

 

You try it with one hand cut off, one foot cut open on the side, and an earplug in one ear.

 

It's 100 times harder than any of you can understand.

 

I know some of you understand this, but for the others, back off! Thank you.

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We weren't necessarily talking about you.....

 

We were discussing the merits of having work experience compared to just pure academics.

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Then what were you talking about for two pages in this thread that chc or some mod split from another thread? I did not ask or want this to be talked about. I was just joking around with Preston.

 

At least about half of these posts did happen to be about me.

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Then what were you talking about for two pages in this thread that chc or some mod split from another thread? I did not ask or want this to be talked about. I was just joking around with Preston.

 

At least about half of these posts did happen to be about me.

 

I'm pretty sure that conversation transformed into University professors concentrating on their research versus their teaching.

Edited by shift

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But in the following quote:

 

Then what were you talking about for two pages in this thread that chc or some mod split from another thread? I did not ask or want this to be talked about. I was just joking around with Preston.

 

You were clearly referring to me. As TL6MT or Big Bang haven't even replied yet....

 

And now you're saying you're not referring to me you're referring to them?...

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Sigh, guys just chill ok. Discuss the matter at hand about education and working together. Working together is good thing, experience means a lot in almost any field. What would an employer want? Some person with a degree or a person with a degree + work experience.

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Some of you guys are really elitist when it comes to education and occupations in general. One can be perfectly happy working a factory or customer service job, while a T1 law school graduate who makes 200K/yr as a freshly minted bachelor would feel perpetually stressed out from the amount of work involved in the industry.

 

It's easy to say "get a job" or "get an education" when you're a healthy-grown individual with a great social circle to support you. Some people are not as fortunate, and there are plenty of things in life that can impede one's effort to become socially integrated, or find the motivation to find a job/apply to college.

 

It's important to encourage people to do something with their life, but it's also prudent to be sensitive and considerate when you do so. Berating somebody with empty words like "get a degree" or to simply "get a counselor" instead of sitting around doing nothing isn't going to help, especially if you don't even know the person, and you weren't asked for encouragement/advice in the first place.

Edited by ty8131990
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Some of you guys are really elitist when it comes to education and occupations in general. One can be perfectly happy working a factory or customer service job, while a T1 law school graduate who makes 200K/yr as a freshly minted bachelor would feel perpetually stressed out from the amount of work involved in the industry.

 

It's easy to say "get a job" or "get an education" when you're a healthy-grown individual with a great social circle to support you. Some people are not as fortunate, and there are plenty of things in life that can impede one's effort to become socially integrated, or find the motivation to find a job/apply to college.

 

It's important to encourage people to do something with their life, but it's also prudent to be sensitive and considerate when you do so. Berating somebody with empty words like "get a degree" or to simply "get a counselor" instead of sitting around doing nothing isn't going to help, especially if you don't even know the person, and you weren't asked for encouragement/advice in the first place.

 

True that the stress level can be lower in some jobs and making less money is acceptable. However, from what I can read, MoM is dissatisfied with his old job and is trying to improve himself. Yes, it may be hard from the "healthy-grown individual..." to see the other side of things, but everyone has to start somewhere. Regardless of our status, don't we always strive to be the best that we can be. Yes, it may seem discouraging or even empty for us to say "get a degree" or to simply "get a counselor", even the cliches have to be said. The implied tone from them may not necessarily be positive but in the end we are really trying to help. Also, the topic stemmed from someone saying they could not afford a PS3 and it turned into a discussion about finding a job. This happened due to continually posting of ideas and suggestions into getting a better job in a certain area. Given the current state of the thread and the openness of APH, there really isn't a wrong in expressing ones idea of getting a better job. The matter is that as long as no one is explicitly abused and or so called berated, it should be tolerated. Sometimes it takes motivation to get something going be it positive or negative.

 

BTW, hey Ty, Where have you been?

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Welcome back Ty. I think you would understand the Situation more if you went through some History (On APH and on other communication platforms) more throughly.

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Yes, it may seem discouraging or even empty for us to say "get a degree" or to simply "get a counselor", even the cliches have to be said. The implied tone from them may not necessarily be positive but in the end we are really trying to help.

 

Berating somebody through a forum is not going to encourage anybody to do anything. Try putting yourself in MoM's shoes -- he has already described his disability in a most indiscreet manner, and said that none of you would understand what he's going through. The best thing to do in this case is to stop telling him what to do, because no amount of armchair therapy is going to diffuse a complex situation like this.

 

If you were his close friend and you knew him personally, by all means. The fact of the matter is that the only association between MoM and some abusive posters on the board is through the forum community.

 

 

Also, the topic stemmed from someone saying they could not afford a PS3 and it turned into a discussion about finding a job. This happened due to continually posting of ideas and suggestions into getting a better job in a certain area. Given the current state of the thread and the openness of APH, there really isn't a wrong in expressing ones idea of getting a better job.

 

Just by reading some of his previous posts, it's quite obvious that MoM doesn't appreciate the "motivation" some of you guys are imposing upon him.

 

 

The matter is that as long as no one is explicitly abused and or so called berated, it should be tolerated. Sometimes it takes motivation to get something going be it positive or negative.

 

It is very much abusive, since some people take the internet seriously and it has taken an emotional toll on MoM. Why else would he say that the forums make him feel like breaking the door down, or trashing his computer?

 

 

Of course, if the abusers just want to flex their epeens and troll MoM, there's nothing wrong with that, as long as you don't mistake their actions for genuine desire to help somebody.

 

Big Bang's post for example, is dripping with insincerity and childishness:

 

My brother, who flunked out of college, now has a full time job working at a factory. His wife, who never went to college, is working a full time job as a customer support specialist.

 

 

lol

 

My Associate's degree was hard enough.

 

I'm smart

 

 

LOL

 

 

BTW, hey Ty, Where have you been?

 

I've been traveling around the world... of warcraft.

 

Welcome back Ty. I think you would understand the Situation more if you went through some History (On APH and on other communication platforms) more throughly.

 

That's quite irrelevant. It is abundantly clear from reading a few posts in this thread that the level of antagonism toward MoM on this board is making him feel very uncomfortable.

 

A self-pitying, socially anxious person is not going to suddenly become the life of the party after reading a few encouraging posts on the internet. Only when the subject recognizes his problem and has a true desire to rectify his situation will he be willing to accept advice and words of encouragement. This has obviously not happened since he continues to refer to the amount of stress he gets from reading the posts of some abusive posters here, and the manner which you berated his efforts in attaining a degree does not help at all.

 

If you want to feel good about yourself by telling a man to "straighten up" like one would tell a homeless person to get a job/stop being so lazy, I'm not going to stop you. Just try not to convince yourself that you're doing any good to MoM by berating him in such a manner.

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Berating somebody through a forum is not going to encourage anybody to do anything. Try putting yourself in MoM's shoes -- he has already described his disability in a most indiscreet manner, and said that none of you would understand what he's going through. The best thing to do in this case is to stop telling him what to do, because no amount of armchair therapy is going to diffuse a complex situation like this.

 

If you were his close friend and you knew him personally, by all means. The fact of the matter is that the only association between MoM and some abusive posters on the board is through the forum community.

 

Ah, this is where you may be wrong. I have been to many school seminars about disabilities, we all had to back in high school. Most of the people were not discouraged by their disability and were actually utilizing it to the best of their ability. One of their biggest messages was to treat them as you would treat anyone else. They don't want to or need to feel "special", that only makes them feel worse about themselves. To treat them like any other person, they actually were comforted and they did not want nor need the pity. As a member of a community, the only thing we can do is give suggestions. No one said they need to follow it by any means, it is similar to buying tech. When we ask about a new build we always go for the better things and give suggestions based on certain characteristics. Just like life when we give suggestions, that is all we are trying to do.

 

Just by reading some of his previous posts, it's quite obvious that MoM doesn't appreciate the "motivation" some of you guys are imposing upon him.

 

Well, I can't say for sure for all members that they are actually helping MoM, but I can say that this is a community and there will be some ideas that float around that don't necessarily help his cause. By no means do APH staff want to remove or censor any ideas that are around, we will step in when there is a need and there is not. It would be wrong for us to censor people's opinion unless they cross a huge line that rarely if ever happens on APH.

 

It is very much abusive, since some people take the internet seriously and it has taken an emotional toll on MoM. Why else would he say that the forums make him feel like breaking the door down, or trashing his computer?

 

Of course, if the abusers just want to flex their epeens and troll MoM, there's nothing wrong with that, as long as you don't mistake their actions for genuine desire to help somebody.

 

Like I said before, what can I say. I can only speak for myself, also another thing to take into consideration is that this is the internet. You have the freedom to choose what to do on it. If something is so stressful and takes a toll on you, why are you not choosing to take a break. This is something we all learn why on the internet, especially with sites that are notorious for flaming. Some of which I will not name but I am sure you can think of a couple of them.

 

That's quite irrelevant. It is abundantly clear from reading a few posts in this thread that the level of antagonism toward MoM on this board is making him feel very uncomfortable.

 

A self-pitying, socially anxious person is not going to suddenly become the life of the party after reading a few encouraging posts on the internet. Only when the subject recognizes his problem and has a true desire to rectify his situation will he be willing to accept advice and words of encouragement. This has obviously not happened since he continues to refer to the amount of stress he gets from reading the posts of some abusive posters here, and the manner which you berated his efforts in attaining a degree does not help at all.

 

If you want to feel good about yourself by telling a man to "straighten up" like one would tell a homeless person to get a job/stop being so lazy, I'm not going to stop you. Just try not to convince yourself that you're doing any good to MoM by berating him in such a manner.

 

To say that some of us are not trying to help is true, however this does not apply to all of us here at APH. Some info that MoM has shared with us is just being restated or simply used to attempt to help him. Since he wants to improve, we are just here to try to help him with suggestions. It is his choice to decide whether or not he should follow them. Taking on the homeless persons perspective, I have helped them out before. I used to volunteer to hand out food for them on the streets in the dark and cold Vancouver Downtown area. Of course, not the worst area, but I have had a chance to speak to a lot of these people. Most of them have had lives before and usually something catastrophic happens to them. They get a lot of suggestions with their lives and it is up to them to follow them. I have told many of them to check into a shelter and they will do the best to help them. I know its easier said than done, but it is out of genuine care that I did so. It's better than telling them to "Get a job" or "Go get your own money". Just like here, I'm not telling MoM to "Go get a job", I am merely suggesting that he should finish his degree since it will only take 2 years and go out and look for a job with that. Yes, it's hard but sometimes the ends justifies the means. I mean, it's better than just looking for a job especially in a area such as the one MoM lives in.

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Most of the people were not discouraged by their disability and were actually utilizing it to the best of their ability. One of their biggest messages was to treat them as you would treat anyone else. They don't want to or need to feel "special", that only makes them feel worse about themselves. To treat them like any other person, they actually were comforted and they did not want nor need the pity. As a member of a community, the only thing we can do is give suggestions.

 

This method of engaging a disabled person only applies to situations where you are actually involved in the person's social life (ie. you are his classmate, or you go to work with him). If a severely handicapped individual says "you have no idea what I'm going through," telling him to man up is not the best response. The best you can do to help is to engage in active listening, not give him more "advice."

 

 

 

Well, I can't say for sure for all members that they are actually helping MoM, but I can say that this is a community and there will be some ideas that float around that don't necessarily help his cause. By no means do APH staff want to remove or censor any ideas that are around, we will step in when there is a need and there is not. It would be wrong for us to censor people's opinion unless they cross a huge line that rarely if ever happens on APH.

 

I'm not saying that a mod should intervene and censor some posts. I'm just saying that the content of some posts, contrary to what you're suggesting, is not "helping" MoM cope with his prescription drugs/mental problems.

 

 

 

Like I said before, what can I say. I can only speak for myself, also another thing to take into consideration is that this is the internet. You have the freedom to choose what to do on it. If something is so stressful and takes a toll on you, why are you not choosing to take a break. This is something we all learn why on the internet, especially with sites that are notorious for flaming. Some of which I will not name but I am sure you can think of a couple of them.

 

To say that some of us are not trying to help is true, however this does not apply to all of us here at APH. Some info that MoM has shared with us is just being restated or simply used to attempt to help him. Since he wants to improve, we are just here to try to help him with suggestions. It is his choice to decide whether or not he should follow them. Taking on the homeless persons perspective, I have helped them out before. I used to volunteer to hand out food for them on the streets in the dark and cold Vancouver Downtown area. Of course, not the worst area, but I have had a chance to speak to a lot of these people. Most of them have had lives before and usually something catastrophic happens to them. They get a lot of suggestions with their lives and it is up to them to follow them. I have told many of them to check into a shelter and they will do the best to help them. I know its easier said than done, but it is out of genuine care that I did so. It's better than telling them to "Get a job" or "Go get your own money". Just like here, I'm not telling MoM to "Go get a job", I am merely suggesting that he should finish his degree since it will only take 2 years and go out and look for a job with that. Yes, it's hard but sometimes the ends justifies the means. I mean, it's better than just looking for a job especially in a area such as the one MoM lives in.

 

My point isn't about how the internet community should be accepting of all people, which I already stated twice. I have the least sympathy for internet drama and alike. What I am suggesting is that:

 

- If you think you're helping a disabled person, or anybody with social problems by being "brutally honest," you probably aren't, especially when you aren't closely associated to him.

- Trolling or flaming him is perfectly fine if it's your thing. It's just not the same thing as helping him cope with his problems.

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For the record I did tell him to take a break from the forums for a bit if what people say is stressing him that much and he did agree (this was regarding the rep issue), that is until he was on the forums the next day.

 

I'm sure some other staff members can agree with me, we have discussed this issue in quite a bit of detail behind the scenes.

 

I don't think I'm being condescending or anything when I'm suggesting to go see a professionally trained counselor. Especially when the issue of violence outside of the internet community is bring brought up.

 

Now I probably shouldn't have said some things that I've said and I'll be the first to admit that. But at the same time, we are honest with MoM because we understand that he has been here for a while and that we appreciate his contribution to the community.

Edited by shift

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Kenneth is right. And there is nothing you have said that we do not understand or put into practice in that regard. Welcome to phase 1. Keep following for another half year (WLM will improve your progress) and come back. :lol:

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