Rogue OLPC laptop runs amuck, USB Missile Launcher threat imminent

// 2008 April Fools News Piece #2

From APH Networks: The United States Government issued an advisory message today to all Americans currently situated abroad in Africa. They warned that a laptop from the One Laptop Per Child program (OLPC) had been infected with Mac OS X 'Leopard' and was currently running loose somewhere in the Congo. Americans abroad were strongly urged to return home or to seek safe harbor in neighboring peaceful nations.

The incident was first reported around 7am GMT after a student in Zimbabwe accidentally tried to install Apple's iTunes program onto his laptop. Once his teacher realized what he had done, she tried to contain the rapidly spreading code, but it was too late. His laptop was infected.

Several people reported seeing the laptop in South Africa about an hour later, where it is assumed that it acquired the USB Missile Launcher that it now possesses from a local warmonger. The latest report from our team on the ground shows that the rogue laptop is blazing a path of destruction up the Atlantic coast of Africa.

The One Laptop Per Child organization is currently working with the U.S. Military to safely bring down the miscreant computer. Neither Apple nor Steve Jobs could be reached for comment.

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